Sun, 1 Jun 2014

4AM: a Conversation

— SjG @ 9:46 am

Me: Huh? What?
Brain: Hello.
Me: Why am I awake? I have to get some sleep before tomorrow’s big meeting.
Brain: I thought this might be a good time to go over some of the more embarrassing and painful moments of your past.
Me: What? Why now.
Brain: Oh, I don’t know. I just figured it would be — well, think about how you could have done so much better, even as a child —
Me: Oh no. We’re not going to dwell on that the lunch bag incident again? That was forty years ago!
Brain: I wasn’t planning on revisiting the lunch bag incident. Still, it is an excellent starting point.
Me: I don’t know why I stomped on that kid’s lunch. He left it out after first recess.
Brain: You know, I have an image of that’s kids face around here somewhere. Ah yes, here it is. He remembered his lunch, and came out to find you and those other kids taking turns stomping on it. Look at that expression!
Me: Oh, God.
Brain: The fact that he probably has no memory of this at all does nothing to lessen the impact of that image. Here, look again!
Me: I need to sleep, not remember ancient history.
Brain: Ancient history! Right, well, I had planned on starting even earlier than first grade.
Me: What?
Brain: Remember in Kindergarten? There was the African-American kid?
Me: He was the first African-American I’d really talked to.
Brain: Right. And you asked him why his hair was “so weird” didn’t you?
Me: I was just a stupid kid!
Brain: Oh, but the questions of stupid kids have impact too. And do you remember the name you called him?
Me: I … no, I can’t —
Brain: You called him “Jaunty.” I have no idea where you came up with that, but remember how much he hated it?
Me: I —
Brain: But you insisted on calling him “Jaunty.” Even I don’t remember his real name, but you liked to annoy him with that nickname.
Me: I don’t know why!
Brain: But you did it. I’m here to remind you of that!
Me: I need to sleep. Can we go through this some other time?
Brain: No, no, no. This is a perfect time!
Me: I have to sleep. I have a meeting tomorrow, and I’ll make more stupid regrettable mistakes if you don’t let me sleep.
Brain: We’ve only just started. I have volumes of material here.
Me: Please?
Brain: Just two incidents, and you already quitting? No, no, no.
Me: Let me sleep.
Brain: Let me see. I have here, seven… no, eight other episodes from Kindergarten alone.
Me: Sleep. I need to sleep.
Brain: Or, perhaps you’d rather jump forward to college? Those are fresher. And, I might add, more embarrassing too. Shall we start with that woman with whom you played those weird eye-contact games during your Literature in Translation class?
Me: Please let me sleep!
Brain: Or shall we review that night you drank too much and barged in on your crush when she was trying to finish her term paper?
Me: OK, that’s it. You’re going to let me sleep, or else.
Brain: Or else? Or else what? You can’t do anything to me. I’m you!
Me: I’m serious. Let me sleep!
Brain: What’re you going to do if I don’t? Drink some booze? Then we can just drunk-dial your ex, and get more material!
Me: I could go out to the garage right now, and start huffing acetone. That’d shut you down!
Brain: You wouldn’t do that.
Me: Keep me awake much longer, and I will!
Brain: You sound like you’re serious.
Me: I am absolutely serious. I mean it!
Brain: OK, OK then. We’ll reconvene on this some other time.
Me: Thank you.
Brain: OK, sleep well then.
Brain: (oh, and enjoy this dream about large spiders)

Sun, 18 May 2014

No, I *am* interested

— SjG @ 5:15 pm

Really. I’m paying complete attention. Why do you ask?


No, I was not yawning.

If I have to explain that I’m a ninja kitteh and that was an invisible hamburger, we’re never going to get anywhere. Now, what was it you were saying?

Sat, 10 May 2014

Not the ‘droids…

— SjG @ 12:20 pm

It always bugged me that the Imperial Stormtroopers in Mos Eisley just took Kenobi’s word at the checkpoint. No, I mean, I get the bit about the Force clouding minds and all. But surely even the Force is not enough to cloud any self-respecting Stormtrooper’s comprehension that an Artoo unit may be a robot, but is certainly not a fucking ‘droid at all!

Anyway, I present without further comment a design suitable for T-Shirts:


Tue, 22 Apr 2014

Annoying Xcode issue and resolution

— SjG @ 3:08 pm

I’d upgraded by home machine to Mavericks fairly soon after the OS was released, but hesitated in upgrading my main work machine. I didn’t want to have extensive downtime while tracking down odd dependencies and incompatibilities.

Well, time came to upgrade. It seemed safe. Everything was fine on my home machine. So I went ahead and upgraded my work machine.

Suddenly, I couldn’t get MacPorts to build MySQL.

I had followed the migration guide carefully. I tried all the usual tricks. In the port /opt/local/var/macports/build/…/config.log, the error was:

ld: library not found for -lcrt1.10.6.o

Google seemed to think this indicated that my Xcode command-line tools were not installed correctly. That library should be installed with all of the Unixy support that comes with Xcode’s command-line tools. Within the Xcode application, it told me that I had the command-line tools 5.1.1 (5B1008) properly installed. When trying various command-line options, the command-line tools were, in fact, installed. For example, xcrun gave the exact results one would expect.

Other tests also made it look like everything was good:
# xcode-select -p

Numerous Googled sites said to use the “xcode-select” command to install the tools if they were not functioning properly. Eventually, I gave in and tried it. Interestingly, this yielded an unexpected result:
# xcode-select --install
xcode-select: error: no developer tools were found, and no install
could be requested (perhaps no UI is present), please install
manually from ''.

Since I had originally installed Xcode under Leopard from a downloaded package rather than recently through the App store, I thought perhaps in the various upgrades something had gotten messed up. I decided to completely uninstalled Xcode:

/Developer/Library/uninstall-devtools --mode=all
I also removed the vestigial /Developer directory, and the /Application/Xcode directory.

I re-installed Xcode from the App store. Everything functioned and/or failed exactly as it had before.

In desperation, I downloaded the Mavericks command line tools package from Apple, and installed it. It should be the same thing as what was installed with Xcode. But it evidently is not, because now I can build the MacPort for MySQL.

edit/update: It may not be clear above, but normally doing the “xcode-select –install” is all that’s needed. It’s also not stated above, but I tried that after re-installing Xcode from scratch, and had the same issue. Evidently, whatever was mis-configured on my machine is quite rare.

Also, don’t trust Xcode when it tells you that it’s installed the command-line tools in the preferences panel like this: Locations_and_Macintosh_HD
It’s probably lying to you – it’s installed stubs, but not the actual tools.

Thu, 27 Feb 2014

No Comment Kitteh

— SjG @ 9:45 pm

No Comment Kitteh